Actor Kajol said Sunday while she is strict with her children, husband Ajay Devgn is the one who spoils them.
The actor said though they play the ‘good cop-bad cop’ routine in real life, Ajay has realised the importance of setting their kids – daughter Nysa and son Yug – straight.
“I’m a Hitler mother… I’m a bad cop, Ajay’s a good cop… But the percentage of the good cop has dropped in him. He has realised that it is necessary to be a bad cop sometimes. That he can’t always look at the mother to say ‘no’. I’m 30 per cent bad cop, 70 per cent good cop,” Kajol said during a session at NDTV’s special youth conclave, ‘YUVA’.
The actor said parenting does not come with a manual and no amount of training can help a person.
“It’s a very much a hands-on job… You have to do an internship with a child… You have to know that you will make mistakes and that others will make mistakes. You’ll have to forgive them and yourself. It is one of the most rewarding jobs… To see your children growing up to become good human beings.”
Kajol said TV and films have established an image of ideal mother, which many first-timers try to achieve.
“An ideal is there. That a good mother cooks food, does this and does that… She sacrifices her life for their kids. If your child thinks you are a good mother, that’s the opinion that matters.”
The actor said social media has changed everything and one cannot protect their children from its impact.
“The least you can do is encourage them to be who they are, irrespective of shape, size, colour… That ‘you matter, you’re loved and you’re beautiful inside out.”
Kajol said her children never stopped her to go to work.
“Maybe in childhood, they asked ‘Why you have to go away?’ But today when my daughter says ‘I’m so proud of you’, I cannot be more proud of myself for having earned that recognition.
“I hope my kids are not affected by my celebrity status. I have tried my best to keep them as normal as possible. I believe they have their head on their shoulders. I think I’ve done a good job.”
The actor said she has never compared her kids with other children and encouraged them to do better.
Asked if Nysa would want to join the industry, how she would help, Kajol said, “She would tell me, I hope. I’d encourage her. I want her to choose for herself – what she wants to do with her life, not what I want her to do.”
On the absence of #MeToo in Bollywood, the actor said she would like not just the film industry but all avenues to adopt the movement.
“It’s something that needs to be adopted in every industry. It’s not the problem of one industry. It’s just that Bollywood is in the spotlight that it is expected to speak up. But what happens after you stand up and say that (you faced sexual harassment)? We also need a backup mechanism.
“You don’t need to feel ashamed for the behaviour you are subjected to. But #MeToo can’t be restricted to Bollywood, not just one section of the society.”
Kajol will be next be seen in “Helicopter Eela”, in which she plays mother to a college-going child. The film is slated to release October 12.